2010.
You guys, it’s happening! Tomorrow! Sorry for the short notice, but I didn’t get much notice myself. Feb 6th from 1pm-9pm, starting at Limerick Junction in Virginia Highlands. Click the poster for more info or go here. It’s $10 to participate, there’s drink specials at each location, and all proceeds go to benefit Red Cross for Haiti relief. So throw away your dignity and traipse about VaHi like a drunken fool…for charity, of course.
2009.
This is a big one, gang. NEXT Thursday, May 28th at 7pm, I’ll be chatting and webcamming LIVE from Beleza in midtown Atlanta to make drinks with Oval vodka. My big beardy head will be there, along with Samantha Harrigan from Cocktail Culture, as well as some local press folks and even an appearance by The DrinkPlanner Guy Who Doesn’t Write. We’ll be working with Beleza’s head bartender Adam Fox mixing up all kinds of drinks, but of course, we need help from all of YOU good people to join us in the chat and give us ideas and suggestions. Otherwise I’ll have nothing to drink, and you don’t want that to happen, do you?
The featured spirit of the evening is Oval vodka, a relatively new vodka from Austria. Now, I know what you’re saying, “Oh great another vodka, PERFECT, as if there weren’t already 5000 other “unique” vodka-snowflakes to choose from. I’ll be sure to buy a bottle just as soon as I finish the other 4999 nearly identical vodkas”. To that I would have to say that TYPICALLY yes, you’d be correct, vodkas are, generally speaking not that different from each other. HOWEVER, Oval has gone the extra step and wrangled the powers of SCIENCE to make their vodka different through a process ominously referred to as “structuring”. It’s an eleven-day vodka re-education boot-camp where they use extremely high temperatures and pressure to alter the alcohol and water on a molecular level. Impressive, right? The end result is each alcohol molecule being surrounded by four water molecules, giving Oval a smoother taste AND a higher percentage of alcohol. Those are both qualities I desire in a vodka. Thanks Science!
So mark your calendars, tie a string around your finger, get it tattooed on your forehead*, REMEMBER that at 7pm Eastern on May 28th you and I have an online date in the Mixoloseum Bar, bring a bottle of Oval with you, and dress smart. I don’t like being stood up.
*Backwards of course, so you can read it in the mirror.
2009.
Starting today and lasting through the 25th of this month, lucky Londoners have the unique privilege of being able to book an hour’s worth of time in a new temporary bar called “Alcoholic Architecture” and breathe in vaporized gin and tonic. A collaboration between Hendrick’s gin and jelly-molders Bompas and Parr, patrons can pay a mere $7 (donning a protective plastic garment to protect their clothes) for an hour in the bar and huff up all the vaporized gin and tonic they like, surrounded by giant limes and straws.
Obviously, I am quite jealous. Not only is it insanely cool to walk around in a room drinking a vaporized cocktail, never once lifting a glass to get your buzz on, but for only $7!?! Let this stand as proof that DREAMS COME TRUE and MIRACLES CAN HAPPEN and that yes indeed, GOD ANSWERS PRAYERS. How else could something this amazing happen in the same world full of horrible things like homelessness and Darfur and American Idol? I mean it stands to reason that the same guy who turned water into wine could just as easily turn gin into AIR, right? Yep, that sounds about right. I think I just earned my Master’s degree in Arguing and Logic right there. Can you guess where my graduation party will be?
2009.
So here’s the deal, gang. Team DrinkPlanner (that’s me and The Other DrinkPlanner Guy) has been kindly invited to a private sake tasting of Koji Sake this Thursday afternoon by none other than the brand’s creator and certified sake sommelier Koji Aoto. We’ll be sampling a wide variety of sakes, and you won’t. Jealous? Of course you are, you’ve always been the jealous type.
But we’ll definitely be thinking of you, dear readers, and we want to take a little bit of you with us. So I’m asking you: What questions should we ask about sake?
I mean I know a little about sake, like that it’s made from rice, and there’s a polishing process where the outer layers are removed and the more polished the rice is, the better the quality, and that there are three types of…oh listen to me, gabbing away like Dr. Sake, Adjunct Professor at Knowing Everything About Sake And Rice Polishing University. If you want the boring textbook knowledge, go read the wikipedia entry. ANYWAY, I want YOUR normal-people questions about sake to take with me on my journey aaaaaallll the way across town in Tucker, GA. So post them in the comments, and I’ll make sure we get you some answers.
2009.
Hey gang. Thursday night! Woo-hoo, amirite!?! So, you have a decision to make. First, if you’re anyone who does not live anywhere near me, which is pretty much everyone:
Thursday Drink Night! This week the crew is taking on the Long Island Iced Tea, which no doubt was the entry point for many of us into the world of cocktail experimentation. The mixology mischief starts at 7pm Eastern…be there!
Your other option this evening is to hit up Winston’s in Marietta tonight for $.64 beers and a tater tot eating contest. No, I did not make that up. Sports talk AM radio station 790 The Zone and Miller are having an event there tonight where from 7-9pm MGD 64 (that new 64 calorie beer, you know the one) is only a scant $.64. I happened to stumble upon the event last Thursday by accident, and they’re repeating it again tonight. The tater tot eating contest starts at 8pm, and there’s a pretty uhm…serious looking contender by the name of “Scrotius Maximus” who they’re advertising will be competing. I am also not making that up.
They had giveaways and a raffle prize last week (6-month gym membership), and I imagine this week will be no different. So if you’re in the area, stop by and guzzle all the flavorless low-calorie beer you can for a super-low price. Suck on that, recession!
2009.
Unless you haven’t turned on a TV in the past few months, you know what a Snuggie is. They’re ridiculous, and they’re everywhere. Your grandmother probably sent you one this Christmas, because she knows you’re too cheap to turn up your heat.
So what do you do with it? You can’t actually use it the way it’s intended, because you’re far too cool for that AND you’re not a shut-in. Throwing it away would be rude. So what do you do? You go on a pub crawl.
Some industrious young so-and-so’s got the idea to take the ubiquitous Snuggie, mix in a little snark and irony, and top it off with a heavy pour of booze to create the Snuggie Pub Crawl. The first will be held in Chicago, but you can enter in your email to be notified of other crawls in other cities. At this moment there are 2365 people signed up for the Chicago Crawl. Holy crap! That’s a lot of people dressed up in blankets looking like they’re in some bizarre sleepy drinking cult roaming the streets.
So go sign up already. I’ve already signed up for the Atlanta one, and as soon as some hard details materialize, I’m going to buy my Snuggie. Unless they schedule it in the Summer, because no amount of ironic internet humor is worth trudging through the city looking like an asshole AND sweating.
And as a bonus, here’s the Snuggie dubbed commercial parody thingy, The WTF Blanket. Language NSFW.
2009.
Confession time, guys: over the past year, I’ve become a rabid 24 fan. I’d never really watched it before (despite the insistent proddings of family and friends who were fans), but with the writer’s strike and everything I had some time and some friends who goaded me into catching up and boy-howdy, did I enjoy it. It’s pure action and fun, and there’s really nothing not to love about it.
It’s just entered its 7th season now, and like any show running for that long, it has developed patterns and trends that happen every season, if not every episode. This is exactly the kind of thing that is ripe for a drinking game. I searched around at what’s already out there, but the current drinking games for 24 are so silly and predictable they’re not worth playing. So guess what I did? If you guessed started an ostrich farm, you’re only half right. The other thing I did was create…
In order to create a balanced and steady game that doesn’t get you wasted in the first 15 mins and then leave you in the lurch for the last 45 mins, I’ve created the following rules. I’ve tried to make them as generic and non-season-specific as possible, so you should be able to go back and play the game with old episodes if you so desire (you should always follow your desires*).
Take one drink if:
- Jack says “damn it!”
- You hear the CTU/FBI ringtone
- Something (security systems, computers, video, etc.) is hacked into
- Someone needs an open socket
Take two drinks if:
- Someone requests something sent to their screen, PDA, or phone
- Someone flanks, moves into position, or secures the perimeter
- Something is going to happen “within the hour”
- Someone needs schematics or requests access codes
- Someone requests to be “patched through” or conferenced in to a call
Take three drinks if:
- Jack orders someone to drop their weapon
- Jack drops his weapon
- Chloe is awkward
- Chloe is a pain in the ass
- Someone is followed
- Jack breaks protocol, the law, or commits treason
- Someone is tortured until they give up information
Take a shot if:
- Jack says he “doesn’t have time to explain”
- Jack says “I just need you to trust me”
- Jack says “Right now he’s our only lead!”
- Jack “had no choice”
- A suspected “bad guy” is really a good guy working undercover
- Someone thought to be dead is actually still alive
Finish your drink if:
- A mole is revealed in CTU, the President’s staff, or the FBI
- Jack recovers from death or near-death in an inhuman amount of time (like within the hour)
- Someone mentions Jack’s wife or his estranged relationship with Kim (this rule won’t work in the 1st season)
I think it’s a pretty solid set of rules. It’s hard to say this season with things being so different if it will still work, but if things keep going the way they have, it should work out just fine. Happy drinking!
*As with anything like this, we’re not responsible if you drink too much and you’re big boys and girls and you should know your limits yadda yadda we don’t have any money to sue for anyway so don’t waste your time.
We’ve written about our sushi-making friends over at Kuroshio before, and I just got wind of another fine deal worth passing on. This Thursday, April 24th they’ll have a certified Sake Master (or Tōji) there from 6pm-8pm to give you the scoop on numerous glasses of premium sake. All for only $3. If you’ve never been to a booze tasting before, I highly recommend it, as it really helps you gain a new appreciation for the stuff even if you’ve been drinking it for years. And if you haven’t, it turns you on to new and exciting ways to get blasted. Everyone wins!
Following the tour they’ll be hosting a comedy show from 8pm-10pm. While I’ve never heard of any of the people featured, they all look funny, so I guess that’s a plus (minus Brooke Cochrane, who looks mighty cute [Editor's note: Still a plus]). The best part? Due to Cobb county’s backwards happy-hour/drink special laws, they’ll be featuring a $3 sake tour special all day. So you might as well sit around and oggle Brooke laugh your ass off and drink sake for a few more hours on the cheap.
Bonus Drink Special!: They’ll also be featuring $1.50 Miller Lite pints.
And as always…tell ‘em DrinkPlanner sent ya!
UPDATE* I just got word that Kuroshio is now carrying Dogfish Head’s 90 Minute IPA! If you haven’t had this fantastic super-hopped craft beer before, it’s quite the treat. Not only that, but they’re selling the bottles in the $5-5.50 range (I wasn’t able to nail down an exact price) while most places are selling them in the $7-7.75 range.
via:: Kuroshio Sushi
2008.
Pop quiz!
Group of people sitting around a table, each with cards in their hands, and there’s a pile in the middle. If I throw a card down on the table from my hand and it’s a 4 of anything…what happens next?
If you said “Social!” then take comfort, you’re among friends. If you didn’t know, drink 2 for not
knowing…and go get us some more beer.
Today I came across something that I couldn’t believe someone hadn’t done before, given how huge card-based drinking games are (and have been for YEARS). I found the well-designed packs of cards offered by Drinking Decks, which offer decks of cards that are all-in-one good for games of Asshole, Circle of Death (aka Kings or King’s Cup), Ride the Bus…and probably for whatever other drinking game you could think to use them for. Honestly, these are some good looking cards, and very reasonably priced for cards this specialized and sexy. Your friends are sure to oohh and aahh the first time you slap these down on the table, checking out the baddass custom designs for each number and face card.
It’s genius really. I mean…what more could you ask for? The card for “social” says social. The card for “give 8″ says give 8. They’re stupid-easy, which is important when you’re playing a drinking game. They look great, and best of all, if someone spills a beer on them (I’m looking at you Amber), they’re cheap and easy to replace.
We here at DrinkPlanner Headquarters are definitely looking forward to ordering a few packs of these and sitting down with some beers and some friends and getting tore up for a few days hours.
Drinking Decks via Jake
2008.
So we just missed it, and we’re ashamed to say it’s all our fault. Yesterday, April 7th, was the 75th anniversary
of the end of prohibition here in the U. S. of A. A notable day indeed, when F. D. R. came to his senses and realized the teetotaling jerkwads of the time were, in fact, completely wrong. A day when we boozers and members of the responsible drinking public earned our respectability and honor by the President saying in no uncertain terms that yes, we who chose to imbibe now and again (or daily or even hourly, if we so choose), are upstanding and of equal (if not greater) caliber than the average U. S citizen. That our effort through bootlegging and backcountry moonshine distilling and bathtub gin making were not in vain, that we were –nay, ARE– the lifeblood of this great nation, and that we as a country are better with our participation in this grand experiment of democracy.
We are the blood that pumps through the working man as he labors endlessly. We are the 3-martini break in the high-powered executive’s workday. We are the shot snuck from the flask by the everyman in the cubicle as he (or she) makes their way through the 9-hour grind. We are the refreshing splash of a cold beer against the back of the throat of every person working for the weekend. We are America, damnit, and we’re here to drink and enjoy it.
So raise a glass, damnit, and drink one for the glory of America!
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